| How Full is Your Bucket? |
Part II
Tom Rath and Donald Clifton offer five strategies for increasing the distribution of positive, healing, empowering emotions in your life and the lives of others.
| 1. | Stop bucket dipping! “If you can’t say something positive, don’t speak at all.” Eliminate negative speech from your vocabulary. Yes, we have to deal with reality, but as the Bible says, let us speak the truth in love, not in anger or rage or disruptive emotions that cut and leave another injured and impaired and drain our own buckets. Rath says we need to monitor ourselves and speak in at least a 5-to-1 ratio of positive emotion to negative. David the Psalmist wrote, “Let the words of my mouth and
the meditations of my heart be acceptable in Thy sight, O Lord,
my strength and my Redeemer.” (Psalm 19:14) |
| 2. | Focus on what is “right” (not wrong)
Celebrate, encourage and reward what people are doing right around you. Start speaking nice about the good things your spouse, your friends and co-workers are doing. I’m reminded of the story of the couple who had been married for about 40 years and it seemed that all they could do was fuss and fight. There never was any real sense of agreement and arguments were standard fare between them. Finally after all those years, one morning she got up and came to the breakfast table and said to her husband who was sitting there reading the paper, “Charlie, I can’t stand it any more. I just can’t stand it—and last night I prayed that God would take one of us home . . . . . . . and after the funeral I plan to move to Cleveland and live with my sister.” Well, maybe what we need to do is work on our positive comments and the depositing of positive emotions into the lives of those whom we love. When you speak derogatorily, you will receive negative results.
When you begin shining a light on what is right---you will begin
a momentum for both yourself and those around you. |
| 3. | Make best friends
The Bible says if you want to have friends, you have to show yourself friendly. Begin working to become: - Close friends with your children Start by learning people’s names. One man said, “I’ve been going to that church for 10 years and I don’t know a soul.” - Whose fault is it? |
| 4. | Give unexpectedly
It doesn’t have to be expensive
to be successful. An unexpected gift can pour a lot of positive
emotions into someone else’s bucket. It doesn’t
have to be tangible either. It can be a gift of trust
or responsibility. It can be a funny little trinket, a hug or
an offer to have coffee together. Send a book or an article to let
someone know you appreciate them. |
| 5. | Donald Clifton modified the Golden Rule
Do unto others as they would have you do unto them. I believe he says that because most people are not born again and do not see themselves as Jesus sees them. Many people are depressed, have no self esteem, and are going around looking for somebody to beat up on them. So naturally the writers wouldn’t want you to treat people that way. But as children of the King, we are forgiven by God, we wear a robe, a gold ring and beautiful shoes in a spiritual sense, and we have forgiven ourselves and love ourselves because Christ has forgiven us and loves us. He died in order that we could treat others as we, as children of the King, would want to be treated. - We would like to have an honest compliment or commendation. Everyone is different and we need to listen and learn what is important in their lives and “fill up their bucket” and in doing so… - Our bucket or cup will overflow. |
and
a kind word and an honest compliment.And the quality of your life will change and those around you will be elevated, fulfilled, productive and reproductive to God’s Glory and the up-building of His Church.
To each of our children let us speak positive emotions into them every day and after prayers at night as they begin to fall asleep.
How full is your bucket? You can only keep your own bucket full of positive emotion by using your dipper every day in every opportunity to fill the buckets of those you love, influence and for whom you are responsible.
God bless!
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